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Candide, Or The Optimist

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Such as had any knowledge of this atrocious attempt were so much the more ready to discover it, as the ministers of religion gave assurance on the part of Mahomet, that every one who had eaten pork, drunk wine, omitted bathing for any number of days together, or had otherwise acted against the express prohibitions of the Alcoran, should be, ipso facto, absolved, upon declaring what they knew concerning the conspiracy. They soon discovered the place of Candide's confinement, which they broke open; and as it was a religious affair, the party worsted were exterminated to a man, agreeably to custom in that case. Candide, marching over a heap of dead bodies, made his escape, triumphed over the greatest peril he had hitherto encountered, and with his attendants resumed the road to his government. He was received there as a favourite who had been honoured with fifty blows of a bull's-pizzle on the soles of his feet in the presence of the King of Kings.  

How Candide becomes a very Great Man, and yet is not contented. 

THE good of philosophy is its inspiring us with a love for our fellow-creatures. Pascal is almost the only philosopher who seems desirous to make us hate our neighbours. Luckily Candide had not read Pascal, and he loved the poor human race very cordially. This was soon perceived by the upright part of the people. They had always kept at a distance from the pretended legates of heaven, but made no scruple of visiting Candide and assisting him with their counsels. He made several wise regulations for the encouragement of agriculture, population, commerce, and the arts. He rewarded those who had made any useful experiments; and even encouraged such as had produced some essays on literature. "When the people in my province are in general content," said he, with a charming candour, "possibly I shall be so myself.'' Candide was a stranger to mankind; he saw himself torn to pieces in seditious libels, and calumniated in a work entitled "The Friend to Mankind."
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