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Candide, Or The Optimist

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New Discoveries. 

CANDIDE was not so unhappy, as he had a true friend. He found in a mongrel valet what the world vainly look for in our quarter of the globe. Perhaps nature, which gives origin to herbs in America that are proper for the maladies of bodies on our continent, has also placed remedies there for the maladies of our hearts and minds. Possibly there are men in the New World of a quite different conformation from us, who are not slaves to personal interests, and are worthy to burn with the noble fire of friendship. How desirable would it be, that instead of bales of indigo and cochineal all covered with blood, some of these men were imported among us! This sort of traffic would be of vast advantage to mankind. Cacambo was of greater value to Candide than a dozen of red sheep loaded with the pebbles of El Dorado. Our philosopher began again to taste the pleasures of life. It was a comfort to him to watch for the conversation of the human species, and not to be a useless member of society. God blessed such pure intentions by giving him, as well as Cacambo, the enjoyment of health. They had got rid of the itch, and fulfilled with cheerfulness the painful functions of their station; but fortune soon deprived them of the security which they enjoyed. Cunegund, who had set her heart upon tormenting her husband, left Copenhagen to follow his footsteps. Chance brought her to the hospital; she was accompanied by a man whom Candide knew to be Baron Thunder-ten-tronckh. One may easily imagine what must have been his surprise. The Baron, who saw him, addressed him thus: "I did not tug long at the oar in the Turkish galleys; the Jesuits heard of my misfortune, and redeemed me for the honour of their society. I have made a journey into Germany, where I received some favours from my father's heirs. I omitted nothing to find my sister; and having learned at Constantinople that she had sailed from thence in a vessel which was shipwrecked on the coasts of Denmark, I disguised myself. I took letters of recommendation to Danish merchants, who have correspondence with the society; and in fine, I found my sister, who still loves you, base and unworthy as you are of her regard; and since you have had the impudence to marry her, I consent to the ratification of the marriage, or rather a new celebration of it, with this express proviso that my sister shall give you only her left hand, which is very reasonable, since she has seventy-one quarters, and you have never a one."
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